Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Conversations with God?

Over at the web site Belief Net they have a survey on peoples' conversations with God. http://www.beliefnet.com/story/200/story_20001_1.html

Then the responder is permitted to leave a comment to the question: In your conversation with God, what would you ask him? What follows are my questions to God.

God,
Regarding the Old Testament. Why did you kill the innocent first born sons of Egypt for the wrong doing of their fathers? Why did you order and permit the Israelites to slaughter innocents in war, leaving only the virgins to live and be taken as captive wives? Wasn't that totally immoral?

Regarding the New Testament. Why does your son say that because I simply don't believe in you, I am morally equivalent to people who do some of the most immoral things, and that I will go to hell for my disbelief? Why do you tell me to honor my parents in the 10 commandments, but then your son Jesus says that I should hate my mother and father, and other family members?

Why don't you really make any coherent sense about anything?

Hello! Innocent children are suffering and dying of AIDS and malnutrition in places like Africa. If you are the perfectly good God that supposedly exists, why don't you do something about it? Are you really just a liar and an evil God? ANSWER ME DAMN IT!

To my dear readers, I will let you know if I get any response to these questions from God. Check back soon. Well, no, wait. If you are really curious about God's possible responses take your time. I don't anticipate a hasty response. However, do check back soon for new posts.

11 comments:

The Atheologist said...

Hey Sheldon, God has just informed me and wants me to tell you that he is very mad at you. He is not going to answer any of your silly questions because he is busy constructing a place that is much worse than hell where you and people just like you will be sent to suffer and be tortured and burned and sliced up and sprayed with lemon juice for ever and ever, (because he loves you). He wants you to know that he doesn’t have to answer anyone’s questions because he is God and it’s all part of his master plan and it will all make sense in the end for those who believe. But he does apologize for the run on sentences. See my post for more details.

concerned citizen said...

well Sheldon, I figure if you would talk to you he'd probally talk to me to & I haven't heard from him yet.

I used to talk to God when I was religious & sometimes would think he was talking back to me. Now i realize it wasn't ever anything that I couldn't of come up with myself.
i was raised in the holy roller Pentecostal church where people spoke in tongues all the time with interpretations(it's supposed to be the Holy Spirit speaking through certain people) Looking back I realize, that never did i ever hear 'God' say anything but mundane crap in these sessions. You'd think if 'God'was going to bother with all that, he'd say some thing really important other then, "My little children I love you, obey my comandments."
Or the other nonsense I used to hear.

It seems like God only says the good stuff to really crazy people like Jim Jones or Son of Sam.

A note of encouragement, your blog posts are well thought out & interesting, keep it up.
come & check out mine also.

JDHURF said...

Good post, I enjoy my blasphemy with a touch of humor! In any case when ever prayer is mentioned it always reminds me of a quote from psychiatrist Thomas Szasz: "If you talk to god, you are praying; if god talks to you, you have schizophrenia."

beepbeepitsme said...

Didn't you get the "god email"? He is busy creating alien life forms out of his own magical navel lint, so he is unable to respond at this particular moment.

Maureen Mower said...

Wait, I thought they told us Bush was God? ;-)

(Might explain why he's slow to answer - has to wait for someone to write it for him first.)

Sheldon said...

Sheldon, You have to remember one thing my friend, God is God and owes NO MAN any explanation. Can the potter say to the clay. "Why have you made me like this"?

God is God plain and simple and owes no one any thing at all. God was gracious enough to send his Son and I pray you find him before it is too late. I have seen Hell and you don't wanna go there.

Sheldon said...

Hmm, how clever. A commenter comes to my blog and comments. It appears that his name is also "Sheldon", but this guy appears to be a "religious Sheldon", not the atheist Sheldon who owns this blog. I click on the name "Sheldon" but it does not take me to this "Sheldon's" profile.

Anyway, in response to the religious Sheldon,
my questions to God are hypothetical and rhetorical and meant to call in question the very existence to God, of which I doubt very strongly.

IF God existed he might not owe me any explanation. However, I can use my mind to ask if anything that people claim about an alleged God makes sense in light of our observations of the world. If they don't then I reach the conclusion that at least this particular God doesn't actually exist.
Sincerely,
The atheist Sheldon

k said...

As much as I despise it, religious-Sheldon's response is probably the most accurate in terms of what you'd expect from the Christian God if He did exist, as it sounds a lot like what that God said at the end of the Book of Job.

Interesting idea though, don't you think? Essentially they're saying that God can do and say whatever he damn well pleases, and we have no right to question it, no matter how inaccurate or immoral it might seem, because He knows everything. Why, God could order us to fly some planes into some buildings, and that would be a-ok, provided that we're sure it was God who said it.

For people who can think like that, I don't think they'll be too bothered by the fact that their God condoned the rape of women captured in war (Num 31:17-18, Deut 21:10-14), to which you referred. I don't think any of it bothers them, so long as they're promised eternal life.

Anonymous said...

TO USE STUDIDITY OF CHRISTIANS ETC ETC ETC AS A COVER FOR YOUR OWN FAILINGS IN OPENING HEART AS BRAIN THAT UNDERSTANDING AS EXPERIENCE BE PASSED TO YOU .. SUCH BEING OF YOUR OWN MAKING NOT MINE......... UNIVERSE CREATED TO SUSTAIN HUMAN FORM VIA HEART AS BRAIN HAVING AS GIVEN YOU THE MEANS TO UNRAVEL ALL MYSTERIOUS...DO NOT WASTE SUCH IN GIVING INSULT TO ME WITH YOUR LACK OF RESPECT IGNORRANCE ARROGANCE AS IN YOUR UTTER BULLSHIT..IT BE YOU THAT WILL NOT EXIST IF NOT MENDING WAYS,BE WARNED... GOD...PS xxx XX

Harry Nads said...

Anyone want to interpret WTF anonymous was trying to say?

Anonymous said...

Is your perceived immorality and hands off nature of God really the only thing preventing you from belief? Is it really that simple?

So if the Old Testament didn't have the messy parts about rape, and there wasn't disease, war, or anything else wrong with the World, you would believe in a God that you can't see?

Because those are the best/only reasons you have given for unbelief. Damn.